Weather
The Pine Tree, News for Calaveras County and Beyond Weather
Amador Angels Camp Arnold Bear Valley Copperopolis Murphys San Andreas Valley Springs Moke Hill/West Point Tuolumne
News
Business Directory
Weather & Roads
Sports
Real Estate
Search
Weekly & Grocery Ads
Entertainment
Life & Style
Government
Law Enforcement
Business
Wine News
Health & Fitness
Home & Garden
Food & Dining
Religion & Faith
Frogtown USA
Legal Notices
Calendar
Polls
Columns
      Chef Chat
      Jenny's Kitchen
      Ken Churches
      ThePineTree Pedaler
      "Calaveras Uncorked"
      "Table Hopping"
      "Tech Talk"
      "What's She Up To Now?"~With Tammy Beilstein
      "The Kid Connection"~by Stefanie Pechan
      Copper Curmudgeon
      Lunch Lady
      Catherine Lewallen
Free Classifieds
Letters to the Editor
Obituaries
About Us

Coming Soon...
Monday, Apr 24
All Day Overeaters Anonymous meeting
10:45 AM Sierra Grief Support Groups
05:00 PM Meditation Class Series with Johanna Atman, Ph.D. CMT
All Day Overeaters Anonymous
Tuesday, Apr 25
All Day Overeaters Anonymous meeting
10:00 AM Marisolio Tasting Bar
All Day Overeaters Anonymous
Wednesday, Apr 26
All Day Overeaters Anonymous meeting
All Day Overeaters Anonymous
Thursday, Apr 27
All Day Overeaters Anonymous meeting
All Day Overeaters Anonymous
Friday, Apr 28
All Day Overeaters Anonymous meeting
10:00 AM Independence Hall Needs Your Stuff! Accepting Donations Every Saturday!!
02:00 PM Low Vision Workshop
All Day Overeaters Anonymous
07:00 PM Speed-the-Plow by David Mamet
07:00 PM Speed-the-Plow by David Mamet
Saturday, Apr 29
All Day Overeaters Anonymous meeting
10:00 AM In Their Words - Vietnam, book signing event
10:00 AM Healing Powers of Flower Essences and Essential Oils with Johanna Atman, Ph.D. CMT
10:00 AM Murphys Historic Walking Tour Every Saturday At 10am
11:00 AM Life After Abuse with Rita Harrison
11:00 AM Grand Opening of Castle Oaks Golf Home Community in Ione
01:00 PM Shakespeare On The Vine Theatre Company’s Annual Spring Gala
01:00 PM Big Trees North Grove Guided Tours Saturdays At 1pm
All Day Overeaters Anonymous
All Day Speed-the-Plow by David Mamet
Sunday, Apr 30
All Day Overeaters Anonymous meeting
03:00 PM Motherlode Friends Of Music Chamber Music Concert
All Day Overeaters Anonymous
All Day Speed-the-Plow by David Mamet
Monday, May 1
All Day Overeaters Anonymous meeting
10:45 AM Sierra Grief Support Groups
All Day Overeaters Anonymous
All Day Speed-the-Plow by David Mamet
Tuesday, May 2
All Day Overeaters Anonymous meeting
All Day Overeaters Anonymous
All Day Speed-the-Plow by David Mamet
Wednesday, May 3
All Day Overeaters Anonymous meeting
All Day Overeaters Anonymous
All Day Speed-the-Plow by David Mamet
Thursday, May 4
All Day Overeaters Anonymous meeting
All Day Overeaters Anonymous
All Day Speed-the-Plow by David Mamet
Friday, May 5
All Day Overeaters Anonymous meeting
10:00 AM Independence Hall Needs Your Stuff! Accepting Donations Every Saturday!!
All Day Overeaters Anonymous
All Day Speed-the-Plow by David Mamet
Saturday, May 6
All Day Overeaters Anonymous meeting
09:00 AM National Wildfire Community Preparedness Day, May 6th
09:00 AM Wildfire Community Prepredness Day
10:00 AM Gem & Craft Show at Kennedy Mine
All Day Overeaters Anonymous
All Day Speed-the-Plow by David Mamet
Sunday, May 7
All Day Overeaters Anonymous meeting
Until 04:00 PM Gem & Craft Show at Kennedy Mine
All Day Overeaters Anonymous
All Day Speed-the-Plow by David Mamet

Search Announcements




Log In
Username

Password

Remember Me



Posted by: Kim_Hamilton on 07/30/2008 12:03 AM Updated by: Kim_Hamilton on 07/30/2008 11:22 PM
Expires: 01/01/2013 12:00 AM
:

Operation Cone Zone~By the PineTree Pedaler, Brett Loring

It sounded like a bomb hitting the house early one morning this past week. Carefully pulling back the curtains I peered outside half-expecting to find a huge tree laying across the deck. Instead, I spied what appeared to be an elongated hand-grenade neatly placed in the middle of the walkway. Cautiously, I stepped outside, and while investigating the scene, there was another “kaboom!” that sent me scurrying for cover under our front porch overhang. Bouncing off the chalet roof with such force that organic shrapnel went flying around me, I narrowly escaped becoming the Ground Zero of a well-placed 3-pound conifer grenade - a shiny green, sap-laden sugarpine cone.....


Click on Photo to See Full Slide Show of Squirrel Gone Nuts!


As if to laugh at startling me so and for being out of my immediate reach, the determined rodent three stories up clung to his bombardier’s perch watching my every move. I had half a mind to fetch the bb gun, but instead decided to taunt him by approaching one of his recently-detonated projectiles. I stood below him on his target site and stared him down. Unsure of his exact species I did my best imitation of Alvin, Theodore, and Simon combined with some Rocky (of Rocky and Bullwinkel). Oddly enough, he began to chatter back, I think cussing me out for honing in on his plunder and interfering with his mission. Nevertheless, for a few more minutes I continued to cluck back at him until he took the offensive and boldly decided to shimmy on down in my direction. It was at the point that I could see the agitation in his eyes and the whites of his overbite as he scampered headlong down the bark of the tree that I decided it best to vacate the premises.

The battle’s not over yet, though. For I’m not about to let these little buggers keep me from strolling freely about on my property! As I walk under squirrel-occupied zones in “duck-and-cover” mode and try to avoid stepping in the fresh, sticky splotches of exploded sappy cones whose substance gets tracked in the house, on the dog, and somehow in my wife’s hair, I’m planning my counter-attack. I’m think I am gonna get out the pellet gun and take charge of some of those remaining nuisances. Those nuisances, of course, would be the green sugarpine cones that remain dangling fifty feet above me as potential bludgeoning devices. I think with a few well-placed shots to the stem of each cone, I can gradually eliminate the military capability of the conifer-loving rodents. As for the squirrels themselves… well, I’ll give them a chance to move onto other cone-bearing trees that are off the beaten path. Or, they can go after their freshly-dropped loot that I now chuck far down the hillside every time I come across it. Off to target practice…


What's Related
These might interest you as well
Calendar

Local News

phpws Business Directory

Photo Albums


Mark Twain Medical Center
Meadowmont Pharmacy
Century 21 Sierra Properties
Bear Valley Real Estate
Bear Valley Cross Country
Cedar Creek Realty
Middleton's Furniture
Cave, Mine & Zip Lines
Bistro Espresso
Pinnacle Physical Therapy
Chatom Winery
Bear Valley Mountain Resort
Paul D. Bertini Premier Properties

Ebbetts Pass Scenic Byway
Sierra Logging Museum
Calaveras Mentoriing Jenny's Kitchen


Copyright © The Pine Tree 2005-2017