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Posted by: hannaheath on 02/20/2008 07:57 PM Updated by: Kim_Hamilton on 02/20/2008 09:04 PM
Expires: 01/01/2013 12:00 AM
:



Are you a Bridezilla? ~By Hanna Heath

The Pine Tree, CA.... Have you ever received a wedding invitation that included a deposit slip to the couple's bank account, or have you ever been a bridesmaid and were asked to go on an extreme crash diet for the big day. If so, then you have been in face-to-face contact with a raging "Bridezilla."....


When you ask a NEWLY engaged bride, have you ever acted/been like a "Bridezilla?" They would say no, because most bridezillas are oblivious to their actions. On the other hand you may come across a bridezilla who knows exactly what she is doing, that is trying to make other people do all the work to make herself feel better.

What are Bridezillas? Bridezillas are a new breed of soon-to-wed women who abuse the idea that weddings are their "day." They terrorize their bridal party and family members, make greedy demands and break all rules of etiquette, to insure that they are the single most important person on the planet from the time they are engaged to the time they are married.

Listed below are some expert tips from Allison Moir-Smith (Bridal Counselor and Author of Emotionally Engaged, on how to avoid becoming a BRIDEZILLA! Please read every detail, these tips can really help!


1. Plan on being overwhelmed. No matter how checked-off your to-do list is, overwhelm is unavoidable on your wedding day. Your wedding is nothing short of life-changing. You won’t be able to predict your emotional state that day, so prepare for lots of feelings, all at once. You can plan to be peaceful and calm, but you may be hyper and giddy, sad and weepy, scared and lonely, angry and fidgety. Or all of the above, all at once.

2. Diminish the effects of Bride Brain. In your non-wedding life, how do you react under extreme stress? Do you get weepy? Helpless? Neurotic? Angry? Clumsy? Obsessive? Forgetful? On your wedding day, these reactions will only be magnified – big time. If you get clumsy when nervous, stay away from glass and sharp objects. Don't drive. (No kidding!) Are you forgetful? Assume you can't complete even one simple task. Delegate.

3. Enlist one solid girlfriend. I tell each bride who takes my workshops that it's essential to have a solid, grounded girlfriend at her side on her wedding day. Not a mother. Not a sister. A girlfriend. Why? Your girlfriend isn't caught up in your family drama. She intuitively knows how best to take care of you. She protects you from stupid questions and stupid people. She knows when you need her to be quiet, and when you need her to talk. A girlfriend puts herself second on your wedding day, so she can be there for you 100%.

4. Practice being overwhelmed. Yes, practice. At your bridal shower, when you are the center of attention, notice your behavior and inner emotional reactions. Do you like who you are and how you behave? Or not? Now, imagine turning up the heat on those feelings by 100 degrees, and you'll get an approximation of how you may feel on your wedding day. If necessary, figure out how you can behave in a way that makes you happy and proud of yourself.

5. Connect with your fiancé. Each day of your wedding weekend, steal time away to deeply connect with each other. Focus. Gaze into each other's eyes. Feel your love. All the wedding hoopla is about your union, so feel united!

6. Allow your wedding to take on a life of its own. Do your planning, but when the Big Day arrives, let your wedding be what it wants to be. A major life event like this will have its own personality, rhythm, and soul. These magical, intangible elements can't be planned to death; they happen. Make room.

7. Let go of perfectionism and be delighted by spontaneity

8. Be emotionally connected to yourself. Your interactions -- even the very brief ones -- will be true and real, and your guests will feel connected to (and visited by) you.

9. Create an image of the bride you want to be. Before your wedding, take some time to reflect and ask yourself, “What kind of bride to I want to be?” List adjectives, attributes, and behaviors. Is being serene of utmost importance? Or is having a rowdy, fun time?

10. Be the bride you want to be. Will the Bridezilla awaken in you? Or not? It’s your choice. Make yourself proud and make yourself happy. Be the bride you want to be.





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